Good morning Year 6! Happy Thursday 🙂
When I was at school, Thursday was always my favourite day (I’m not sure why!) maybe it was because we had double PE which was my favourite lesson in secondary school!
Anyway, today we’re going to do some writing! I’m so excited to see what you’re able to write. Today is for practise. That means that you can write your opening sentence or first few sentences on the blog and then I can give feedback. Then you can finish your writing in your Home Learning Books, making sure you proof read and edit as you go!
I love reading what you write-I really do!
Task (to complete by Friday afternoon)
To write a non-chronological report all about elephants!
On Tuesday, you should have completed your research and written notes in your Home Learning Books. Today, you are going to start writing it!
Purpose
Features
Don’t forget to share the start of your writing for me to mark-perhaps the introduction and first subheading?
However, don’t type it all up today – we want to share everyone’s finished pieces tomorrow.
When you are editing, here are some questions you might want to think about:
- Is every sentence correctly punctuated?
- Have I checked my spellings?
- Have I used technical language?
- Do my subheadings and paragraphs match?
- Is my report clearly structured?
- Have I written in the 3rd person?
Miss Gorick and Mrs Healy xx
Have a look at Anahi’s report below!
My non- chronological report
Elephants are the largest land animals on Earth, and they’re one of the most unique-looking animals, too. This Non-chronological report is going to tell you all about these amazing animals.
Habitat :
Elephants live in tropical and subtropical regions of Africa and Asia.
They are found most often in grasslands, and forests, but they also live in deserts,mountains and in swamps.
Hi Lola! Thank you for sending in the start of your report-It is great to hear from you!
🙂 You have clearly structured your writing using subheadings. Continue to do this as it will make it very clear to read! I’m also impressed to see that you have used hyphens correctly.
T) As you continue, see if you can use parenthesis (brackets or pairs of dashes) to add extra information!
Well done!
Hi Gabriel 🙂 I’m sorry for the delay in getting back to you.
Book recommendations:
-Artemis Fowl by Eoin Colfer
-Charmed Life by Diana Wynne Jones
-Goodnight Mister Tom by Michelle Magorian
-Journey to the River Sea by Eva Ibbotson
-Northern Lights by Philip Pullman
-Phoenix by S. F. Said
-A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning by Lemony Snicket
-Skellig by David Almond
-Wolf Brother by Michelle Paver
I hope this helps!
Hello,
Here is the introduction and first subheading of my report:
All about elephants
These 3m tall mammals are the largest animals on land and have trunks as strong as 5 men. If you’re wondering where these creatures live or how they simply survive, then read on.
Habitat:
Hello Luke 🙂 Thank you sending in your introduction. Gosh trunks as strong as 5 men…that’s amazing!
I look forward to reading the rest of your report. As you continue, make sure that your subheadings match the paragraph underneath and see if you can use parenthesis (brackets or dashes) to add extra information.
Well done!
Hi Jada 🙂 Sorry for the delay in getting back to you.
I’ve been having a think about book recommendations and books that are similar to ‘Heidi’ that you recently enjoyed:
These are all ‘old fashioned’ books written in the 1900s but similar style to Heidi and very famous!
-Pollyanna by Eleanor H. Porter
-A little princess by Frances Hodgson Burnett
-Tom’s Midnight Garden by Philippa Pearce
-Ballet Shoes by Noel Streatfeild
-The Secret Garden by Frances Hodgson Burnett
For creative writing books, I recommend
-Spilling Ink: A Young Writer’s Handbook by Ellen Potter
-How to Write Your Best Story Ever! by Christopher Edge
I hope this helps!
I have read The secret garden and Toms midnight garden and I really recommend it to anyone who doesnt know what book to read!
Thanks for replying Lola! It’s great to hear that you also recommend these books 🙂
Hello Mrs Healy and Miss Gorick,
I hope everyone is okay 🙂
The weeks seem to be flying by,don’t you think so too?
Here is the start of my non-chronological report:
ELEPHANTS
Elephants are very big animals,who live in very hot climate.There are two types of elephants,African Elephants and Asian Elephants.They are very interesting creatures and are full of suprising facts.If you want to learn more about these fascinating creatures,well read on for this report will tell you all you need to know about Elephants.
APPEARANCES
As i mentioned before Elephants are huge they can weigh up to 14000 pounds and they can be up to 13 feet large.They are land mammals with trunks,big ears and tusks.African Elephants are the largest land animals in the world!Most of the time you will see elephants in a group called a parade with calves (babies) and adults.Elephants typically have grey skin though sometimes you may see them with brown -reddish skin for they put colored mud on themselves (read on to find more about elephants and colored mud).
Stay safe 🙂
jade
Hi Jade 🙂 It is great to hear from you and thank you for sending in your work! I agree, the weeks in lock down are flying by…
🙂 I really enjoyed sending in the start of your report. You have structured it well using subheadings and I like how you have used parenthesis to add extra information (). It is very clear to read.
T) To improve, I would re read and rephrase this sentence ‘If you want to learn more about these fascinating creatures,well read on for this report will tell you all you need to know about Elephants’. I think that you have got an extra word that you don’t need to include.
Well done!
Here’s my intro and one subheading. Please give feedback on what to improve…
Elephants
Elephants of are one of the largest animals in the world and can weigh up to an astonishing 7500kg which is seven and a half tons. An elephant’s trunk has up to 40,000 muscles in it and we have 800 in are entire body!
Diet
Elephants usually feed on a lot of plants such as herbs, broadleaved trees, vines, grasses, and palms.
Elephants will digest nearly every part of the plant including twigs, leaves, shoots, bark, flowers, branches, tubers, fruit and many more.
They are known to consume 100-500 different plant species.
(I’m just finishing off my whole piece now)
Hi Aryan 🙂 Thank you so much for sending in the start of your work-I have really enjoyed reading it.
🙂 Your report is well structured using subheadings and you have included lots of amazing facts! I never knew how many muscles there were in an elephant’s trunk…!
T) To improve, I suggest adding an extra sentence to your introduction to explain to the reader the purpose of the report.
Well done!
I already finished my non chronological report on Tuesday!
What shouldo I do now?
Hi Eliza! Thank you for sending in your work-I will read it and get back to you with some feedback.
Morning Miss! Do we publish our work on this blog?
Yes please 🙂 or send it in if you prefer!
Ok thank you !
Hi miss Gorick,i have just finished readingHarry Potter and the chamber of secrets,i really enjoyed it.Do you have any recommendations for books you think in might like?thanks!
Hi Ariella 🙂 I’m glad to hear that you enjoyed reading Harry Potter!
Hmm…I’ve had a think about books similar to Harry Potter and written my list below:
-His Dark Materials (Northern Lights)-Philip Pullman
-Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief-Rick Riordan (this is a whole series of fantasy adventure books)
-Top Marks For Murder by Robin Stevens
I hope this helps! If anyone else has any other suggestions, please let Ariella know!
Hi Ariella,
Miss suggested Top marks For murder by Robin Stevens and if your not too scared of murder stories there is actually a whole collection(Murder most unladylike series).I suggest you start with the first one which is amazing and full of mystery.It is called A murder most unladylike and then you can read Arsenic for tea,First class murder,Jolly foul play,Mistletoe and murder,A spoonful of murder,Death in the spotlight,Top Marks for murder and then Cream buns and crime.
It’s a really good serie 🙂
Thanks so much for your suggestions Jade!
Thank you Jade that is really helpfully;) I will try to get the first book in the series,sounds excite it!??
Sorry, I missed out the first subheading
Habitat:
Elephants are adapted to warm Savannah’s or grasslands. South/South Eastern Asia and Africa fit this perfectly and although lone elephants are commonly found in zoos, they are usually found travelling in herds in the wild.
Thanks Luke!
‘South/South Eastern Asia and Africa fit this perfectly…’ Could you increase the clarity in this sentence so the reader is clear what you are referring to?
Hi Anahi 🙂
Thank you for sending in your report-I really enjoyed reading it!
🙂 I think it was great how you linked the introduction to your own personal experiences! Your report is also clearly structured with subheadings which makes it very clear for the reader to read. I also like how you have included questions which make the reader pause and reflect on what you have said.
T) My only suggestion is to include an underlined subheading after you finish talking about Asian elephants to make it clear that the last few sections refer to both elephants.
Well done Anahi-you have written a brilliant report and I will share it above!
Thank you Miss Gorick for your feedback, I will underline the subheading now.??
It’s just a minor improvement as I thought it was a brilliant report!
Thank you for the feedback,
Here’s my improved sentence:
South/Southeast Asia and Africa fit these conditions perfectly…
Great Luke-that is much clearer! Well done 🙂
Hi Eliza 🙂 Thank you for sending in your elephant report!
I can see that you have structured your report with subheadings which makes it clear for the reader to read.
Sadly, I am struggling to read from the photo-please could you either re upload it or type up your first paragraph?
Thank you!
Here is the introduction to my non-chronological report.
Elephants:
These are huge animals and are so big that the African elephant is the largest land Mammal in the world. there are two big species of elephant African elephant and Asian elephant. in this report you will be learning about both of them.
Hi Nina 🙂 Thank you for sending in your introduction.
You have clearly stated what the reader will learn in the report which is important in an introduction so well done!
T) To improve, just check for mistakes with capital letters ( I can spot 3).
Well done and I look forward to reading the rest!
The introduction to my chronological report:
From Dumbo to Elmer, Elephants are known from across the world. They are the largest land animal in the world and only have two main species left, African and Asian elephants.
Hi Haleema 🙂 Thank you for sending in your introduction!
🙂 I really like how you have started with something relatable for the reader!
T) As you continue writing, use subheadings to help to structure your writing and make it clear for the reader to follow.
Also, ‘elephant doesn’t need a capital ‘e’ 🙂
I look forward to reading more tomorrow.
Well done Haleema!
Hi Paloma 🙂 Thank you for sending in the start of your report.
🙂 I can see that you are clearly structuring your writing with subheadings and your use of brackets is effective for adding extra information.
T) To improve, check your spellings in a dictionary.
Well done Paloma 🙂 I look forward to reading the rest!
Here is my introduction:
These magnificent creatures and are known all around this planet…