Good morning, Year 5!
Today’s English focus: Published Writing
Today you can type up your finished piece of work to share with the class.
I am so proud to have a class of…
This will be your redraft after the feedback given to you on your draft writing. Please look back at any targets from before and apply these to your final versions. You may have had some targets from last week so ensure that you focus on improving on those today as well.
On this blog, I will give you some positive feedback and I would encourage everyone to read each other’s and offer some positive feedback.
If you prefer to hand-write this, you can upload a photo of your letter using the Homework Uploader but please ensure your letter is signed off with your name. First name only!
Please use the checklist to check you have included these in your balanced argument:
We look forward to reading your wonderful writing!
Good luck and have a lovely half-term! The next blogs will start on 1st June. Please check out the Home Learning section of the school website if you want to try more activities.
Stay safe and have a good break.
Mrs Avdiu & Ms Robertson
You can find a printable version of this blog here: Friday Writing blog week 5
Please consider the environment and only print this if necessary.
Hello everyone! I hope that you have had a great week! I did today’s English task on my own, but I did enjoy it! This is what I wrote! I really hope that you like it! By the way, I wrote it completely different to yesterday….
=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=
People earn different amounts of money based on their working hours, skills, capabilities and their education level. There are different types of jobs that provide different earning. Many wealthy people give donations to specific organisations and charities. Some people would agree, that the wealthy people should keep doing this. On the other hand, some disagree.
Wealthy people have more opportunities and ways to help, such as creating jobs for the less fortunate to work and earn their own income. There are people who would disagree with this – they would say that wealthy people should just mind their own business.
This could be because they are uncertain if the people who we see on the streets as homeless, are actually telling the truth about who they are.
There are many ways to help, and we should all do as much as we can so that everyone could have a fair life…
_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~
HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND EVERYONE!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ELENA!
HAVE A GREAT DAY! ????
~ Nika
???
P.S. Stay safe, be brave, have fun!
Thank you Nika. Take care when writing a balanced argument as it can sometimes read like a ‘list’. Always use the checklist I provided to help you with separating it into paragraphs. Some good points made though! Have a lovely half-term.
Good Morning Mrs Avdiu
We have uploaded our English work.
Thank you girls!
Great balanced arguments outlining the different arguments in detail. Well done! I really like the way you both presented your work too. Have a lovely half-term girls.
Good morning everyone, here is my completed balanced argument.
Different people think different things, “poor people deserve what they got,” or, “give to the poor and homeless,” but who is right? There are many arguments for and against rich people giving to the poor and in this balanced argument, we will explore both sides of this matter.
One one hand, rich people have more money than they need and use it on extravagant items while poor people suffer harsh lives on the streets. The richest 1% in the UK have the same amount of money as the poorest 55% and lots of people think that this is extremely unfair; that is why there are charities. Charities collect money either by fundraising, sponsorships, or people just donating it to them, and give the money to the poor. Many people also think that this is very efficient and it should be kept up, while others don’t agree.
From a different point of view, there are some people who pretend to be homeless while actually they are just collecting money since they’re too lazy to work, or just are greedy for money. Similarly, there are also many rich people who donate millions, sometimes billions to the poor, homeless, sick or people living in developing countries. These people like Bill Gates or Warren Buffet have given more than 45% of their total earnings to causes around the world. Some people think “why should they have to give all their money? Shouldn’t they stop?”
Overall, I think that charities are the best idea because if everyone gives a bit, it can make a big difference and as Neil Armstrong once famously said, “one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind.” If we all do our bit, we can achieve anything.
Excellent. I enjoyed reading your balanced argument. Well done for writing an introduction and a conclusion! Have a lovely half-term.
Good morning everyone, I hope that you are all well. I have written out my whole argument here I hope you like it (I changed the introduction a little bit but not a lot):
In our there is a big difference between the rich and poor and I would like to share some key points about both sides. I do think that the rich should hare their money but if they have worked really hard then they should keep it for themselves. It is important for everyone to be treated equally, here are my arguments for each side.
I believe that the richer should share their money with people less fortunate than themselves because if everyone shared their money equally then there wouldn’t be a need for arguments. Then the poor would be able to get all the food and essentials they need. God gave us life to be kind to others and share what we have. The richer people would be doing God’s work by sharing what they have with people not as privileged as themselves, this would make everyone a lot happier as the poor would be happy as they could now afford food and drink and the rich would have done a good deed.
I do think that rich should not share their money with the poor because lots of rich people have worked really hard for their money and might also need it for themselves. If I were them, I would not see the point of giving away money that they have worked hard for, the poor could just try and earn it for themselves like everyone else does. The poor could get a job and work their ay up to get the things they need
As for me, I consider that the rich should share their wealth with the poor because the world should be a fair and equal place where everyone van have the things they need to survive, we should be able to live knowing that everyday is going to be a good day. I think that the rich should share what they have as God has given these people lots of luxury hoping that they are kind enough to share what they have been given.
Well done Elsa for writing the different arguments and concluding it with your own opinion. Please always proofread your writing before submitting the comment as there are a few words missing. Check the first paragraph especially. This can make it a little tricky for the reader to understand your point. Have a lovely half term 🙂
Hello everyone. I hope you are all well.This is my balanced argument:
People ask this question: should rich people help poor people? Some people think that they should help because the poor also need things but sometimes can’t afford to get themselves what they need. Other people think that they shouldn’t help; they consider that poor people can manage on their own and believe that rich people would like to keep their own money.
On one hand, poor people have a right to have these needs: water, food and shelter but sometimes they can’t get these as they have no money. On the other hand some argue, rich people might not want to give the money away to poor people and sometimes, poor people can’t be trusted, as a few might do bad things with the money like spending it on drugs, alcohol and cigarettes. However, they might be poor because they do not have access to things or they can’t work (example: they are ill = have to go to hospital = they can’t work = no money.) Some people say that people are already helping the poor by paying tax. While other people say even though people are already helping the poor, it is not enough.
I think that very rich people should pay more tax and give money to charities. The poor people can then get money from local government and from taxes. If a lot of people contribute to pay taxes, then the poor people can have what they need to live a normal life and people can be wealthy too.
Super sentence starters relevant to this type of argument- well done. Do you think rich people will find your solution fair?
Hello Everyone !!
Thank you so much Nika for saying Happy Birthday to me !!
I miss you all so much !!
Down below you will see today´s task !!
Different people have different opinions of a certain thing like some people think that we should give money to the homeless people as they need it to survive and they need a shelter to live under. Other people think that maybe the homeless people did not do something right and maybe that is why they are on the streets.
If we all do our part in helping homeless people and giving them money we might all feel like we have helped a small corner of the world, homeless people have no education they have no food or water they have no shelter to live under.
Wealthy people have more opportunities such as a magnificent job , a very nice house to live and fantastic food and water to eat and drink. They also get paid more money for maybe working more work hours.
Some people do not have the opportunity like some wealthy people do which I find a bit unfair becase in life everyone should be happy. I think that charities will help a lot since we can give money to the charity and then we know where our money is being used. Charities will make the world a more friendly place. We can all make a difference!!
I hope you all enjoyed 🙂 !!
~Elena
Hope you are having a lovely birthday! 🙂
Thanks for sharing your balanced argument. You have raised some very good points. In future, try to include more sentence openers like the ones I shared yesterday.
Hello everyone I hope you are all ok this is my finished balanced argument.
On one hand the rich people do already give the poor some money by paying more taxes, which is then giving to the poor by the government. On the other hand most rich people waste their money on silly things and don’t share because they want to keep it for themselves.Although rich people may be a bit generous, there are still millions of poor starving and thirsty with no home. Sometimes it is the poor people that are very jealous of the rich that are trying to help them.The rich and the poor are similar in that they are just people and some are good and some are bad. So we will have to investigate further to find out.
I think that different countries and people earn a different amount of money depending on what they do. Maybe if everyone gathers together and shares a little money well make a difference. I think instead of giving money to the poor buy hem food and water or just talk to them or give them a smile they’ll appreciate it a lot.
Hi Claudia, please consider an introduction and conclusion to better lay out your argument. I am really pleased you have tried to include a variety of sentence openers, well done 🙂
On the other hand, if we keep giving the poor money, they will not try to support themselves. Other people say that if we give them more money, the poor who are addicted to drugs, will buy more and more instead of buying things they need. Similarly, when the poor beg, it lacks dignity and respect for themselves.
I think we should give the poor money but not directly or then the will not use it for things that they need.
Hi Gabriella, is this your complete balanced argument?
Hello everyone
There are lots of people in this world some are rich some are in between rich and poor, and some are poor. The rich people have lots of money to buy whatever they want while the poor people can’t buy anything. This is extremely unfair. Luckily there are charities that help poor people but there are still people suffering on the streets and not much people are really helping and yet some rich people aren’t giving anything so something should be done.
There are also people who pretend to be poor so they can get money. This is also not good, I understand that is why people just walk right past poor people and some rich people give lots of their money just for the homeless but nobody knows if a poor person is actually pretending. Maybe If we see someone on the streets we can buy them some food or something. If we all work together then we can achieve anything.
Thanks Mathilde for raising some fair points. Have you had a look at the checklist to ensure you have all the features for this piece of writing? It should not read like a speech.
A lot of people who have so much money are greedy and selfish, they don’t give any to others not even the poor people who live on the streets suffering from hunger, cold weather and hot weather. Some people also think that the poor deserve to be on the streets because they might have done something wrong. However some people want to give to the poor but don’t know if they are being real or fake when asking for money.
In my own opinion, I think that instead of giving to the poor on the streets directly you should give to charities that help the poor because if you give it to them on the streets they may use it to buy drugs and all that stuff, which is a waste. I think you should give food and drinks to the people on the streets but give money directly to the poor charities.
Hi Dylan. Most rich people do give to others so that may not be a fair statement to start your argument with? Also you seem to be focusing your argument on whether people should give money to those on the street. Have a look at yesterday’s blog for the focus of this piece of writing.
Good morning everyone!?
This is my balanced argument.
I do think rich people should help poor people by giving them money. I think this because if poor people do not get money they will not be able to buy find and therefore will not survive. On the other hand, people may think that the rich people worked hard to earn their money and because of this, shouldn’t give it away. However in my view, it is also a good thing to do because nobody deserves to freeze on the streets, or struggle to buy food.
On the flip side, some people may argue that if the poor people are given money for not working, they will not be encouraged to get a job for themselves. Nevertheless,if you are fortunate enough to be rich then as a member of society, money is a good thing to share with those who are less fortunate because it improves the general standard of living.
Despite this, people think that poor people should get a job if they want money but I think that sometimes people are not able to get a job. For example, people who have mental or physical disabilities find it hard to work so we need to help them, as they are not always able to work.
In conclusion, rich people should share their money with poor people because it improves society overall and it improves the life and wellbeing of poor people.
I hope you all have a great half-term!?
Excellent variety of sentence openers. Well done! Have a super half term.
Good morning everyone!
Different people think different things.
Some people think that rich people should give money to the poor and others think that poor people need to work to earn money.
Today I will be discussing with you whether rich people should give money to the poor or whether rich people should not help the poor by giving them money.
On one hand many people think that rich people should help the poor otherwise the poor will not be able to survive for long without food, water and warm clothing.
People also think that rich people should give money to the poor as rich people do not need so much money so they should give some of it away to help the poor people. On the other hand some people think that poor people should not get money from the rich as rich people worked hard to earn their money so poor people should do the same and earn it by working.
I personally think that rich people should help the poor by giving them money as they will not survive out on the streets and it is not good for their health.
I hope you all have a great day!
Excellent points made! Next time try to use a wider variety of sentence starters (which I provided for you) rather than just ‘on the one hand’, ‘on the other hand’ as this can get a little repetitive…
Hi everyone,
I didn’t get a chance to write my first paragraph on yesterday’s blog but I will post the whole thing on today’s blog if that’s OK ?.
Some people think that it is the state’s duty to manage the wealth of the rich and the poor. Others believe that this should be down to individual people.
On one hand, there are people who say that the rich should give or share their money with poor people so that all society has an equal amount of money. In this view, everybody should have an income to provide their families with food and shelter. According to this point of view, wealth is seen as having to shared so that every person should have a decent chance with their life and this point of view also fights for equality in society.
On the other hand, if rich people do give their money to the poor they could use it to spend on drugs, alcohol or cigarettes. Lots of people also believe that it is not the rich people’s duty to share the money but it is the charities and the state as well. It is also hard to see whether the money they give is actually going directly to the poor.
Personally, I think that all rich people should at least try to help the poor through taxes or through charity.
I hope you all have a great day! ?????
Thanks Seb. As today is the publishing day, it may be beneficial to you if you post your first paragraph on Thursdays so that you can get feedback on your writing before writing the full piece! You have made some good points but I think the introduction could be a little longer with more detail on the argument. Also, could you check your conclusion as it is a little short and abrupt?
Hi everyone I hope you’re doing okay.
Rich v Poor. This isn’t a new argument – it’s been going on for quite some time, hundreds and hundreds of years and will probably never be resolved.
Basically, some people will always have more wealth than others. Money, houses, clothes, cars, holidays… the list goes on. And of course, the people who have all these nice things want to keep them and the people without them wish they had them.
This is a situation that creates angry reactions from both sides. The rich will say they have worked hard for all they have and the poor will say they have worked hard as well but get very little in return.
Money = Power = Opportunity = Privilege and so it goes on.
The top jobs in the United Kingdom and the highest earners of money are heavily represented by the people with great family wealth and private educations. It is very difficult to survive and be successful if from the beginning of a persons life they have struggled. People born in to poorer areas for example have a shorter life expectancy than people who can afford better homes, food and medicines. In March 2019 the Office for National Statistics stated that “Men in the most deprived areas could expect to die 9.4 years earlier than counterparts in the richest places, while for women the figure was 7.4 years”.
But so many of those who are privileged want to keep everything from themselves – although because they have never truly experienced poverty you could argue it is difficult for them to fully understand and sympathise with poorer people.
I personally think rich people should pay a bit more attention to the poor and try help them a bit more. Some rich people are selfish and self-centred but some are generous and give money to people in need. I just think that everyone should take a moment and help the poor.
~Iggy
Well done Iggy! You have tried to look at it from both sides and indeed it is an ongoing debate… Try to include a wider range of sentence openers by using the ones I shared with you yesterday.
Nowadays more and more people live in poverty and struggle to make the ends meet.
In my opinion I believe the wealth is not distributed fairly in the society. On one hand there are families who can’t afford food and basic necessities. They have to rely on food banks and benefits to feed their family’s. Providing food for their children is probably there major worry. On the other hand the rich do not have to worry about shortages in food and live a life of luxury. They create their own world not knowing how the poor live.
I personally think the rich could help more. Even though I do not agree with the rich giving up their whole wealth, but they could donate some of their money to charities which help people in need.
Overall, I believe the world would be a better place if we try to get rid of poverty as eliminate the gap between the rich and the poor.
*-*-**-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
I hope you enjoy your weekend!!
Maia???
Excellent points and well done for including an overall conclusion!
Thank you Jeanne for your wonderful writing!
Hello everyone,
I hope you are having a great day so far!!!? ????
This is my paragraph:
People think differently. Some of them sadly doesn’t want to help homeless people, but some other do want to help everyone in need.
On one hand, some of the rich don’t want to give some money because they work very hard to have a good life and they want to show it. They are not interested by sharing with others.
On the other hand, some rich want to help poor people because they consider they have enough money to share with others. And I think it is a way of life which is inside yourself. If you have been told since your childhood to share, it is then normal to share if you could. They can put money in charities, buy some cloth, water, food and perhaps some toys. They are many ways to help.
?* We are big family so we should help everyone in need. * ?
.+¤*??? ?*¤+.
Happy birthday Elena ???? ????
Hi Violette. In English we say ‘Some of them sadly don’t want to …’ rather than ‘doesn’t want to’.
I am confused by the statmenet ‘it is a way of life which is inside yourself’ – can you rephrase this?
I do agree that we are all one big family 🙂
Hi everyone.
Though there are people who are very rich or well-off some people are very, very poor. They might not have a place to sleep or food to eat, while some people live fine and other people live greedily. However, not all rich people are mean and selfish, many do give to the poor, but others disagree and think, why should they give their money(they’ve worked for),to people who are less-fortunate.
However, some poor people waste their money on beer and cigarettes;some don’t. Similarity, some poor people grew up from a poor family, so they were naturally poor, but not all of them do. Although, it’s nice to give, the wealthy people have worked hard for that money, so why should they give to poor people? Nonetheless, some wealthy people grew up from a poor family, so it is possible to come from a poor family and become really rich.
I think that both sides of the argument are valid, that rich people should give to the poor and, rich people shouldn’t give to the poor.
Great points, Sara! Your conclusion is a little confusing and conflicting. Please revisit this…
Hi Everyone,
On this planet, there is a big difference on the amount of money between the rich and poor people, which creates a lot of inequalities. Here I will share with you all of my key points about whether rich people should or should not give money to the poor.
On one hand, almost all of the rich people have worked really hard to create companies or do their job well so they shouldn’t give their money. Secondly, if a person gives money to someone on the streets, they could spend it on drugs or alcohol.
Rich people should donate part of their money to charity because it isn’t fair on poor people who wish to have some money and a home but they don’t have any of those so they live on the streets . For example they have to beg. Rich people do have a lot of money but some of them literally throw it away by buying really a expensive things that they don’t need. There are a few rich people like Bill Gates ( the founder of Microsoft ) who is very rich but he supports a number of trusted charities to do good.
There are some poor people living in the streets because they lost all of their money on gambling, drugs and bets although a lot don’t have a job or grew up in a poor family and did not have access to education. I am not saying that the rich should give all of their money but they should give a good amount to trusted charities.
I think that rich people should donate some of their money to charities on a regular basis because it will be invested in a projects to help the poor and not be used for example to buy drugs.
Well done Marco for making an effort to vary your sentence starters in the first two paragraphs but this should have continued for the rest of your writing. You made some very valid points and concluded with your opinion on the matter. Take care when writing ‘I am not saying’ as this is a piece of written work and not spoken.
Hi everyone.
Here is the rest of my balanced argument. ?
Some people in the world are rich but others are very poor. But the question is, should we give money to the poor? I will be discussing on why rich should give money and why rich should not give money to the less fortunate.
Firstly, I think the rich should give to the poor because they could spend it on everyday things that they need for example, clothes like jackets when it is cold and shoes. They could also spend it on healthy food ?, and water. Another reason rich should give to poor is because you might as well make their day and make them smile ? because they would be able to buy things they need (of course only the good things ?).
On the other hand, I don’t think rich people should give to the poor because some cruel people actually pretend to be poor so they can get some money and it’s also like they’re stealing from you which isn’t very good. Secondly, they could spend it on things they would not need or things which is not good for them such as cigarettes ?, alcohol or other things which are bad for your health.
I therefore conclude that you could maybe give the money to charity instead because they are the ones who are able to help the poor and they give food, water and shelter for them. You would also know that the money would be used in a good way unlike giving it to the poor wherein you don’t know what they would spend it on. ??♀
I hope you enjoyed reading my balanced argument. ?
Have a lovely weekend. ?
Fantastic range of sentence openers. Well done, Renee! You made some very valid points and I did enjoy reading it. I especially liked your conclusion as you included much of the appropriate vocabulary for this topic. Have a great half term!