Yesterday you began writing your postcards with lots of descriptive writing to Rabbit and Bear about your adventures as the woodpecker.
Lots of you made a great start writing your first paragraph and I was able to give you some feedback to improve.
Today’s English focus is:
Published Writing
Task
Today is an opportunity to finish off your writing from yesterday (if you haven’t already). Make sure you read over your writing and improve if it you can by adding in even more description.
Once you have completed your writing, edit your work. Use the checklist below to help you.
Click HERE for some help with proofreading your writing. You might like to try the activities at the bottom of the page.
Once you have edited your work, write your final draft in your best handwriting with all of the corrections. You might like to write your published piece in the style of a postcard or alternatively type it up on the blog.
Then, write your first name on your work and upload a photo of it. I will add it to the gallery, where I can give you feedback.
I look forward to reading your amazing finished pieces!
Challenge
Read your friends letters and write some feedback about it on the blog!
25 comments on “English Task – Published Writing 12.6.20”
Can you please send me a postcard because I’m in Algeria near the capital and heading back up to Doggerland (where you are) so I can see what is going on over there.
Still, in other news the Mediterranean is full of predators and prey and very foggy making it hard to maneuver. I am flying away from a battle with a hungry eagle! In fact it almost ate me! It happened like this: I was doing some bird parkour in the trees when out of nowhere it swooped just into view and headed towards me like a sky bull charging and then put its slobbering mouth around me which was disgusting. Unluckily it’s teeth damaged my tail. He started to splutter from the feathers chocking him. Screeching with pain I pecked my way out of the distracted eagles’s mouth! This happened a few days ago. A lucky escape, but not so fast, the eagle recovered quickly and is still out there looking for me. (uh-oh!) Right now I’m gliding on the water to get out of this sea of danger!
From Woodpecker
P.S. Can you see more rivers or missing trees? I think Doggerland is sinking!
pp.s. After my break I will post my handwritten version of this
Dear Rabbit and Bear
We are flying south for the winter we have to go 200 miles I have done about 95. It is really hard non stop with sharp winds. We have passed some really rotten places that were really crowded. It has been really cold lately so us birds are all chattering.
It has been getting really hot lately and we are thinking about staying here but it is sweltering. We hear crackling noises from creatures below.
We are in the middle of the forest and it is really strange because it is really in the forest. We have done 150 miles. When we got there it was unlike anything we have ever seen.
It was really great and when it gets cold we will have to go there again.It had caves that echo and the trees are brilliant.
From Bird
Dear rabbit+Bear
I am having a great time here in south. I am having parties, discos and water fights! Wish you guys were here I am making more and more friends.
Best wishes
Woodpecker
I met a friend her name is called Hippo I miss you and I cant what for you to get hear . I hope rabbit is not scared! you need to came the letter is going to be shout because I need to play with Hippo we are going to play hide and seek. ” When are you coming”? please come I am in a hotel It even has a pool! You are my best friends , and we will always be thorougher and there is a honey tree, and a scratching tree . there is a beach . Have you met any friends . I will be writing to you again
from woodpecker ?
Dear Rabbit and Bear,
I am flying south for the winter we have long to go but we are
enjoying it so much. we were so tired. we had to take a break too
write post card. I miss you a lot.
A lovely postcard Helena, you have shared lots of interesting information about your travels! I’m sure Bear and Rabbit would love to reply to you, well done.
Great effort Julian, thanks for sending in your work. Wow, you sound like you have been in great danger on your travels! It may be a good idea to see your friends Bear and Rabbit back home! 🙂
Thanks for sending your work again Karolina. I really enjoyed reading it, I can see you have worked hard! You have added in lots of lovely details which make your writing interesting to read! Well done for checking over your spelling too 🙂
Dear Rabbit and Bear,
Can you please send me a postcard because I’m in Algeria near the capital and heading back up to Doggerland (where you are) so I can see what is going on over there.
Still, in other news the Mediterranean is full of predators and prey and very foggy making it hard to maneuver. I am flying away from a battle with a hungry eagle! In fact it almost ate me! It happened like this: I was doing some bird parkour in the trees when out of nowhere it swooped just into view and headed towards me like a sky bull charging and then put its slobbering mouth around me which was disgusting. Unluckily it’s teeth damaged my tail. He started to splutter from the feathers chocking him. Screeching with pain I pecked my way out of the distracted eagles’s mouth! This happened a few days ago. A lucky escape, but not so fast, the eagle recovered quickly and is still out there looking for me. (uh-oh!) Right now I’m gliding on the water to get out of this sea of danger!
From Woodpecker
P.S. Can you see more rivers or missing trees? I think Doggerland is sinking!
pp.s. After my break I will post my handwritten version of this
Super effort Julian, you have used some interesting vocabulary! Well done for adding in detail 🙂
Well done Celestine for publishing your work. I like how you have added in some questions to your writing to show your care for your friends.
Well done Chloe K, you have explained your journey clearly and what you been busy doing!
Dear Rabbit and Bear
We are flying south for the winter we have to go 200 miles I have done about 95. It is really hard non stop with sharp winds. We have passed some really rotten places that were really crowded. It has been really cold lately so us birds are all chattering.
It has been getting really hot lately and we are thinking about staying here but it is sweltering. We hear crackling noises from creatures below.
We are in the middle of the forest and it is really strange because it is really in the forest. We have done 150 miles. When we got there it was unlike anything we have ever seen.
It was really great and when it gets cold we will have to go there again.It had caves that echo and the trees are brilliant.
From Bird
Well done Patrick, you have included some lovely details about your travels! 🙂
Dear rabbit+Bear
I am having a great time here in south. I am having parties, discos and water fights! Wish you guys were here I am making more and more friends.
Best wishes
Woodpecker
Good effort Gabriella, remember to include details about what you have been doing on your travels.
Dear rabbit and bear,
I met a friend her name is called Hippo I miss you and I cant what for you to get hear . I hope rabbit is not scared! you need to came the letter is going to be shout because I need to play with Hippo we are going to play hide and seek. ” When are you coming”? please come I am in a hotel It even has a pool! You are my best friends , and we will always be thorougher and there is a honey tree, and a scratching tree . there is a beach . Have you met any friends . I will be writing to you again
from woodpecker ?
Good effort Graceanne, that’s nice that you made a friend! Remember you don’t need to include inverted commas when you are writing to someone.
Well done Chloe H! You have been very creative with your postcard! Well done for including lots of information about your adventures!
Good effort Louis, remember to include all of the things you have been doing on your travels.
Dear Rabbit and Bear,
I am flying south for the winter we have long to go but we are
enjoying it so much. we were so tired. we had to take a break too
write post card. I miss you a lot.
from bird
Well done Holly, remember to include what you have done on your travels! 🙂
Hello Miss
I send my homeworek on blog.Thank you .
Have nice weekend
.
Hi Karolina, your work didn’t upload properly, please try again if you would like me to see it 🙂 Have a lovely weekend too!
A lovely postcard Helena, you have shared lots of interesting information about your travels! I’m sure Bear and Rabbit would love to reply to you, well done.
Your journey sounds like a real adventure Matthias, well done. I’m glad you found a container of seeds to peck on!
Great effort Jiana, I am glad you made some new friends on your travels! Well done for including some questions too in your writing.
Great effort Julian, thanks for sending in your work. Wow, you sound like you have been in great danger on your travels! It may be a good idea to see your friends Bear and Rabbit back home! 🙂
Thanks for sending your work again Karolina. I really enjoyed reading it, I can see you have worked hard! You have added in lots of lovely details which make your writing interesting to read! Well done for checking over your spelling too 🙂
Hi Miss
I have sent a picture of my finished letter
Hope you have a good weekend . Can’t wait to see you on Zoom on Monday
Well done Penelope, very neat work. Sorry to hear your feathers are holding you back from flying! You have included some lovely ideas, good effort.
Wow Angie, super effort with your postcard! You have included fantastic detail about your travels and what you did. Well done!
Brilliant effort with your postcard Alex, wow you have joined your writing too which is super, well done 🙂