Hello Class 1!
I was so impressed with your first drafts of your diary entries yesterday! Well done, you should all be proud of your writing!
Today is a chance for you to share your final versions of your diaries.
If you can, write out your diary using your neatest handwriting and send in a photo of it, then I can make a gallery on the blog of your wonderful writing!
Some things to remember…
Don’t forget to use capital letters, full stops and beautiful handwriting!
Include all of the features of a diary entry. Use this handy check list to proof-read your work before sending it in!
Remember you are writing a diary entry imagining that you are Tom travelling to the North Pole to rescue your dad.
This will be your last lesson on The Great Explorer Story! You have all produced some fantastic work linked to this text so here is a virtual sticker for you all:
I can’t wait to read your final diary entries!
From Miss Lee 🙂
You might want to use this special polar bear writing paper: Polar Bear Paper
FOR A PRINTABLE VERSION OF THIS BLOG, PLEASE CLICK HERE: English to print
Dear Miss Lee,
Friday 19th June 2020 9AM
Dear Diary,
First I woke up and saw in the newspaper that my daddy was lost in the North Pole. I felt worried and nervous. Also excited about the adventure and brave that I was going to rescue my daddy!
Next I packed my bag with things like winter clothing, food, water, a tent, a first aid box and lots of other important things.
Then I set sail. It was a long journey. I knew I was there when I saw big ice bergs. My boat got stuck in them! I used my hot air balloon to get out. I saw the beautiful Northern Lights. They looked magical! My hot air balloon got hit by a passing satellite. My parachute saved me. It was fun sliding down the cliff, but I met a scary walrus at the bottom! I jumped over the ice. My tent blew away in the snow. I ran from a scary polar bear in a cave. I slept in an igloo that I built. I caught fish for breakfast.
Finally that night I found my daddy in a tent with a broken foot! A helicopter took us home. I felt very happy and proud that I rescued him.
I am going to send you a photo of my diary now.
Hello Saoirse!
Very well done for reading your feedback from yesterday and adding more time connectives!
You have included all of the features of a diary and written so many super sentences!
Fantastic work!
The only thing left to do is sign off your diary at the end (don’t forget you are writing as Tom)! You might want to write a sentence like ‘I wonder where my next adventure will take me. From Tom.’ or ‘I will write again soon! From Tom.’
Hi, Miss Lee!
My mom told me she sent you a picture of my work earlier today. Did you get it?
She also sent one of the work of yesterday and computing of yesterday as well that I didn’t see in the blogs of yesterday.
Thank you!
Hello Camila!
Thank you for sending in your work!
I will read it now!
I saw your work from yesterday, there is a comment on yesterday’s English blog for you, it was very good!
Sorry I forgot to mention yesterday that I was on an online course in the afternoon so couldn’t check the blogs then. I am just going through all of the files now to ensure all of the work for the week is uploaded!
Well done for working so hard!
Hello Miss Lee,
I have finished writing my diary and I have sent it to you.
Have a lovely day.
Hello Jay!
Thank you very much for sending in your diary!
You have included all of the features of a diary! Super work!
Don’t forget to start your sentence after ‘Dear Diary,’ with a capital letter.
Thank you Miss Lee. My last sentence will be:
My next trip will be a relaxing holiday on a hot beach with my daddy as we are both tired!
From Tom.
A great final sentence!
I think Tom and his daddy will definitely go somewhere relaxing after their eventful adventure in the North Pole!
Thank you, Miss Lee!
Sorry I only saw the comments of yesterday now. Hope the work of today was good without it.
Have a good weekend!
It was a wonderful diary entry!
Thank you! I hope you have a good weekend too!
Hello Julia!
Thank you for sending in your diary!
How lovely that Tom made friends with the polar bear in your diary!
Don’t forget to sign the diary off from Tom rather than writing ‘The End.’
Hello Camila!
Thank you for sending in your diary!
What a fabulous piece of writing! I could really imagine everything you described in your writing! I love the way you described the stars and the ice as ‘a bit like stepping on mud but much colder and prettier.’ Super work!
Dear Miss Lee.
I have emailed my diary entry for The Great Explorer.
When I woke Up this morning I was really hungry so I went fishing. I made a fire to cook my fish and then I set off on my journey.
In the afternoon a Pole bear came up to me. It was really angry so I ran away. In the evening I saw my dad. He had broken his leg. I tried to get help and fortunately someone came. When we got home we celebrated and I felt proud for saving my dad.
Thank you for sending in your work Isabella!
A great diary entry! Well done for including the features of a diary!
Next time, don’t forget to end your diary with From ________
For this diary it would be ‘From Tom.’
You could even add another sentence to say where your next adventure might be for example ‘Next time we will not go somewhere so cold! From Tom.’
Hello Mateus!
Thank you for sending in your work!
I like how you used the special polar bear writing paper!
Well done for including lots of the features of a diary and for writing so much! I am very impressed!
Next time, try to write how you are feeling right after writing about the event so that all of your feelings are not all written at the end.
have a wonderful weekend!
Dear Miss Lee.
Thank you. I am sorry I forgot to sign it from Tom.
I have written it at the end of my letter.
Isabella
Hello Isabella!
Don’t worry, sometimes all of your writing is so fantastic I forget you are not my Year 4 class and I didn’t mention on the blog about signing off the diary because I was confusing you all with my Year 4’s!
Well done for adding it on to your diary! You are very hard working!
Have a great weekend!